On January 20, the U.S. Supreme Court overturned a law that banned political spending by corporations in candidate elections.  As Justice Stevens said, this decision makes  “corporate speech the same as that of human beings”.   I think it is only a matter of time before corporations begin to assert their unalienable rights as human beings and demand full citizenship.  If all goes as planned, the high court will rule favorably in the precedent setting “Apple vs the State of California” and Apple will win the governor’s race in the state elections.

When this happens we can look forward to a new era of fiscal responsibility and visionary leadership for a state that is sadly overwhelmed by failed ideas and big government spending.  Here are some of the insanely great public policy innovations that we can expect from the brilliant engineers at Apple:

  • California is re-branded iCal.  New logos and graphic look and feel standards are instituted.
  • Apple introduces the iCar, the only vehicle to pass California’s tough new vehicle usability standards and thus, the only car available for sale in the state.
  • A two year contract is now required for California citizenship.
  • Apple launches iTunes Liquor Store.  The Liquor Control Board mandates that all alcoholic beverages must be purchased through iTunes.  Purchases are licensed to a single household, but can be shared with up to five other iTunes users.
  • A slew of trademark violation suits are filed against companies using the name CaliforniaTM without permission.
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